||More Israeli Gothic||

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• The UN soldiers at Cafe Anan in the Golan Heights have a rectangular hole in the sleeves of their uniforms where their national flags should be. They’re not eating or drinking anything, but are sitting bolt upright at the tables, staring at each other instead of the view. You don’t know what language they speak; you’ve been there for three hours and they haven’t said a word.

• There is a sign at the old city of Nazareth that says “DID YOU KNOW THAT JESUS WAS A MUSLIM?” As you progress through the city, you find more: “DID YOU KNOW THAT YOUR FAVORITE SPICE GIRL WAS A MUSLIM?” “DID YOU KNOW THAT YOUR MIDDLE SCHOOL PRINCIPLE WAS A MUSLIM?” “DID YOU KNOW THAT YOU WERE A MUSLIM?”

• you’re on your way back home from azrieli. youre waiting for a train to netanya. it’s been hours and hours and the train is not here. you ask a bypasser, dressed in all black, “excuse me, do you know when the train to netanya will be here?” there is silence. he stares at you with big, sad eyes and hands you a small keychain bible. he simply answers with “the train will come when the messiah does.”

• You sit in the Azrieli Mall, drinking a coffee and watching the soldiers. Some of their shoulder tags have leaves on them. Some of their shoulder tags have flying snakes on them. Some of their shoulder tags have two hands cradling an eyeball on them. Some of their shoulder tags have the skeleton of a mountain goat on them. Some of their shoulder tags have a pair of eyes crying blood on them. Some of their shoulder tags have a picture of your childhood home on them, with your parents and dog standing outside. Those soldiers have orange berets and carry very large guns.